What If?

What if? What if I go and find you and hold you and be with you? Then, when I have to leave once more and there’s no next meeting in sight, what then? 

What if when we try to talk every day it just gets harder and harder, kind of like it is now? Was it was easier before, without a date and confirmation that we would see each other once more? 

What if I just Built you up in my head to be something that you aren’t, but instead something I really wish you were? What if you aren’t my second chance, my next attempt at having feelings? 

What if this is just me getting hurt again?